Nursery Rhymes for People in their Late 40s

Please sing along. It helps.

The Alphabet Song

A, B, C, D, E, F, G

H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P

Q, R, S, T, U, V

W, X, Y, Z

I still know my ABCs

Prevagen is helping me.

Eeny Meeny Miny Moe

Eeny meeny miny moe

I wake up to pee, you know.

There are issues with the flow,

Eeny meeny miny moe.

Pop Goes the Weasel!

In our youth the body was strong,

Everything was gleeful.

Now if I turn my neck too far,

Pop! Goes the weasel!

Bengay for a creaky back,

Getting old is evil.

If I don’t stretch out far enough,

Pop! Goes the weasel!

Idiopathic knee aches,

The pain is almost lethal.

Don’t forget your copper fit or,

Pop! Goes the weasel!

Up and down the steep side walk,

My big toe acts medieval.

Now it seems I have the gout,

Pop! Goes the weasel!

Little Miss Muffet

Little miss Muffet she sat on her tuffet, eating her bran and whey

Along came her mister, who could not resist her

Saying, “You’ll make a doodie today!”

Hey Diddle Diddle

Hey diddle diddle

Wanna hear a riddle?

Night driving is harder to do

The little wife laughs to see such struggles

But she is even blinder than you

Hey diddle diddle (x2).

Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to fetch a glass of vino.

Jack fell down and looked around

and Jill kept laughing after.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to fetch a glass of vino.

Jill fell down and ripped her gown

and Jack kept laughing after.

Jack and Jill went up the hill

to fetch a glass of vino.

Rapidly they drank it down

One glass and they’re hungover!

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, knees and toes

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, knees and toes.

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, knees and toes.

And eyes and ears and mouth and nose.

Head, shoulders, knees, and toes, knees and toes; 

All ache.

Twinkle, twinkle, little star

Twinkle, twinkle, little star

We ate Thai, I feel bizarre

Prilosec for this heartburn

Seems as though I’ll never learn

Twinkle, twinkle, little star.

We ate Thai, I feel bizarre.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

All the Excedrin and every surgeon,

Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

Rock-a-Bye Baby

Rock a bye baby, if the noise drops,

Snoring so loud, it won’t ever stop.

When they shut up, I finally fall,

And then it resumes, to hell with it all.