Congratulations on successfully boring me to death as you demonstrated your new toolkit in our staff meeting today. To literally die in the dimly lit conference room as you espoused the virtues of a tool you wasted an enormous amount of time and resources on, was not how I expected to go out. And yet, here we are. Continue reading “An Open Letter to Judith”
In 1986, Jon Bon Jovi and his band decided to turn Tommy, now 56, and Gina, now 54, into household names. The major rock anthem about a down on their luck couple, was supposed to propel these two Jersey lovers into a lifetime of fame and glory. It didn’t go as planned. Continue reading “Livin’ On a Prayer Doesn’t Work”
But enough of me. Let’s talk about you. What do you think of me? – Ed Koch
Inspired by Ben Lecomte, who is hoping to become the first person to swim across the Pacific Ocean, I’ve decided to attempt something far more dangerous, and, if successful, far more impressive. Continue reading “Self-Awareness”
It’s not you, and don’t you dare go thinking for a second that it is! You aren’t the reason people ignore you to focus on that annoyingly hard to achieve Cloud right above you. There isn’t a more overrated Cloud out there than Nine. Continue reading “An Open Letter to Cloud Eight”
There are several misnomers and stereotypes about life in a fitness center sauna. It is my duty to dispel those rumors.
First and foremost, the sauna at my local gym is not overrun by former-KGB, towel-wearing, Russian oligarchs, with white chest hair and scary accents. In fact, that couldn’t be farther from the truth. These intimidating men are from Uzbekistan, and it’s best not to lavish them with praise of “Mother Russia.” They hate that. Continue reading “The Sauna Effect”